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I little bit of what I fancy tastes so good
Yet those who know the Little Chef will understand that the platter he holds aloft contains the still beating heart of British grub rather than an expensive haute cuisine snack destined for Coleen McCloughlin's delicate little mouth.
That's British grub in a world where Michelin refers to the tyres on a rep-mobile rather than the stuffy endorsement of some Gallic gastronome.
And just recently, the wheels so very nearly came off. Business complications more to do with high rents than unprofitable breakfasts meant that the company which operates Little Chef was placed into administration.
On the same day came the good news that turnaround specialist RCapital had bought 193 of the 235 Little Chef sites, including most of those in the north west.
Having struggled with losses amounting to é3m in the last 12 months, chief executive Simon Heath now speaks of a huge task ahead.
And I'm taking up the Little Chef's tantalising offer as part of a mission to assess just how big a pile of chips the tiny chap has to climb.
My fellow diners are a mix of businessman, couples and local families.
Formica
The surroundings are a mix of formica, wood and 1950s roadside diner. It's all open plan, which means that I can actually see cook Shonagh Melville standing over the griddle as she prepares my choice from a menu so traditional that it boasts about free-range eggs as though they're something brand new.
And my choice has to be the legendary Olympic breakfast, a feast so hearty that I assume its name means you need athletic strength simply to pick it up.
Foodies like Jamie Oliver would probably scoff at it. Maybe so, but it tastes darn good. But then there's something a little unreconstructed about the entire Little Chef experience.
Smoking may no longer be on the menu and internet access is now available, but there's something quintessentially English about the Chef's café style of eating out.
So what went wrong? Little Chef's prices are probably one of its biggest problems. The Olympic breakfast might be big, but é6.99 is still a difficult price to swallow.
Panini
A jacket potato and beans is é3.99, while a panini and chips will set you back around a fiver.
But that perhaps doesn't matter to fraught families and travelling salesmen.
To them, the Little Chef sign amounts to sanctuary at the side of a road as the lorries thundering past are silenced by the sound of sizzling and inoffensive background muzak.
Customer service is also second to none. One dapper business type wanders in looking lost and is quickly despatched to the bathroom by a helpful member of staff who acknowledges that: "I could tell straight away what it was you wanted."
The business type turns out to be sales manager Phillip Gorton, 53, a fan of the Little Chef for more than 20 years.
Having left only the chipped potato part of his Olympic breakfast, the surprisingly svelte customer says the Little Chef's demise would probably have left him eating crusty service station sandwiches in his car. To say he's a fan is an understatement: he loves the service, the food and the staff.
Fellow diner Alan Scott, 55, is just as regular yet not quite so enthusiastic.
Import
He's in the import/export business and says that standards have slipped in the 20 years he has been using Little Chef restaurants.
He thinks they have seen better days but suggests subtle changes rather than a radical departure.
"Maybe they do need to think about a more varied menu. It is a little pricey," he says. "They need to attract more families."
Maybe so, but perhaps the biggest difficulty facing the chain is updating its offering without alienating its loyal fanbase.
Astley branch manager Jan Holmes has worked at the Little Chef for 20 years and talks fondly of regulars who will queue out of the door on a Sunday.
"I'm absolutely delighted that the future of this Little Chef is secure," Jan says. "The whole team can't wait to welcome back our loyal customers. We're starting the New Year with renewed confidence.
"I'd also like to thank the local people for their support over the last few weeks."
What do you think? Have your say.
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